You slowly destroy yourself, You break your soul, Your mind is in chains, And felicity in syringes; You throw yourself into the abyss, The darkness seduces you, You bear all the burden, Your thoughts are dry; Your feelings are in ecstasy, Your cheeks are rosy, Your enchanted pond, Plunges you into trouble; A nightmare too real, A completely ideal delirium, A radical tumult, A colossal conflict; Torture masked in paradise, A theater scene from a dream, A compromise for euphoria, Of conscience and closed spirit; A captivating demon, A tempting dance, A seductive thought, An incriminating offence; An innocent intention, A deep inspiration, An uncontrolled exhalation, A sinful pretension; A terrible ordeal, In disguised tartarus, Thousands of ideas arise, With a bizarre air; The mind is impoverished in torture, Infused with fierce venom, But the sky of essence is clear, Omitting the thorn of darkness; When you wake up from your mirage, The withdrawal hits you like a thunderbolt, Suddenly fate takes a turn, Towards a deep chasm dominated by blockage; For a dose of dopamine, You sacrifice your complete peace, Cigarette ash like a mine, Towards a realm of serotonin; But you only postpone your pain, You drown your suffering in pleasure, Which at some point disappears, And then tears of salt remain; The agony is quickly amplified, By a counterfeit harmony: With lips of ice you are kissed, By a silent loss of self; The purity of your being is intact, Just waiting to be liberated. Caught in the clutches of needles, You cry out for help desperately; But the fairies with human faces, Driven by kindness and affection, Choose the moment for a miracle, To dispel your bitterness; Poisoned by gloomy thoughts, Your vision is blurred by shadows, Of the dark experiences of the past, And you do not notice the saving light; They exist and always watch over you, They pave your way and guide you, Just allow them, they do not defy you, But free you from the spell of the trap; Open your eyes and the gates of your heart, And you will find that the seraphim are near: Art, nature, love, and the splendor of the world, As well as the magnanimity of family and friends;
I love this - the word choices are INCREDIBLE. I felt every emotion. I do wish I could read it in Romanian though, I bet it sounds ten times better. Either way, you have such a talent bringing all of these images together and making it work, I hope you're proud of yourself. With all the pain that life brings, it is also such a priviledge to be able to live. I hope you are doing well, sending you much love always
Aww, thank you soo much my darling, Iβm so excited that you read it in Romanian also, Iβm prouder of that version as the rhyme scheme works much better there hehe xD Sending you lots of lovee ππ
This is rich, intense, and surprisingly compassionate beneath all the darkness. Youβve written addiction as poetic and brutally honest: the seduction, the escape, the crash, the self-betrayal, and then that fragile thread of hope at the end.
The emotional range in this poem is impressive. You move from ecstasy to despair, from venom to beauty, from collapse to a quiet kind of salvation.
The imagery is vivid: βlips of ice,β βenchanted pond,β βdisguised Tartarus,β βfairies with human faces.β It gives the whole thing a surreal, dreamlike atmosphere that mirrors the way addiction distorts reality.
At the end, you donβt deny the pain, but you offer something real: the idea that the world still holds light, still holds art and love, and that the person is not ruined, only waiting to be freed.
This is powerful writing. Heavy, beautiful, and full of heart ππ«Άβ¨
Awww, thank you incredibly much my dear!! ππ You perfectly depicted the nuances, emotions and the message across my poem, in your introspective and thoughtful beautiful style. I feel so flattered and thrilled reading your very kind and comprehensive reflection. π
Particularly regarding the imagery and the final idea, that was exactly my intent, to portray these aspects as you gorgeously described.
I really enjoyed that. Beautifully written, and after starting out somewhat dark and painful, it ends with hope and optimism and becomes somewhat uplifting.
I love this - the word choices are INCREDIBLE. I felt every emotion. I do wish I could read it in Romanian though, I bet it sounds ten times better. Either way, you have such a talent bringing all of these images together and making it work, I hope you're proud of yourself. With all the pain that life brings, it is also such a priviledge to be able to live. I hope you are doing well, sending you much love always
Aww, your message honestly made my day my darling!! ππ Thank you incredibly much for your kindness and sweet compliments, I'm so glad that you could feel all the emotions across the poem. And yess, in Romanian it sounds definitely much better hehe, how kind of you to say that π₯Ίπ So beautifully portrayed, it is indeed a priviledge to live despite all the pain. I wish you all the happiness in the world and I hope that everything is going great, sending lots of love right back at youu π«ΆπΌπ©·
so true i hope we learn from the lessons and continue moving forward π
That's what weβll do for sureππ
So good I read it in Romanian too (I know it's so dang good in your mother tongue) <3 <3 β Λｑβΰ¨ΰ§Λ
Aww, thank you soo much my darling, Iβm so excited that you read it in Romanian also, Iβm prouder of that version as the rhyme scheme works much better there hehe xD Sending you lots of lovee ππ
I'm sure it does, and just like in English too, so beautifully written!! Well done my angel <3 <3 :D
Thank you soo much my sweet angel, sending you lots of love!! ππ
I love the lush imagery π
Had a great time reading this poem!
Thank you soo much my dear, Iβm really glad you enjoyed reading my poem! ππ
This is rich, intense, and surprisingly compassionate beneath all the darkness. Youβve written addiction as poetic and brutally honest: the seduction, the escape, the crash, the self-betrayal, and then that fragile thread of hope at the end.
The emotional range in this poem is impressive. You move from ecstasy to despair, from venom to beauty, from collapse to a quiet kind of salvation.
The imagery is vivid: βlips of ice,β βenchanted pond,β βdisguised Tartarus,β βfairies with human faces.β It gives the whole thing a surreal, dreamlike atmosphere that mirrors the way addiction distorts reality.
At the end, you donβt deny the pain, but you offer something real: the idea that the world still holds light, still holds art and love, and that the person is not ruined, only waiting to be freed.
This is powerful writing. Heavy, beautiful, and full of heart ππ«Άβ¨
Awww, thank you incredibly much my dear!! ππ You perfectly depicted the nuances, emotions and the message across my poem, in your introspective and thoughtful beautiful style. I feel so flattered and thrilled reading your very kind and comprehensive reflection. π
Particularly regarding the imagery and the final idea, that was exactly my intent, to portray these aspects as you gorgeously described.
I always look forward to your comments, which bring me a lot of joy and excitement, you are so so sweet!! π©·
Thank you so much πππ. Your poem had such clear feeling in it, so it was easy to respond honestly.
I always enjoy your work and Iβm grateful you share it with us π«Άβ¨
Aww, thank you so, so much!! ππ I love your writing and wonderful insights, and I'm grateful as well that you let us into your word realm π©·π©·
Beautiful written, Elena!
Thank you so much, Iβm really glad you enjoyed it! π
I really enjoyed that. Beautifully written, and after starting out somewhat dark and painful, it ends with hope and optimism and becomes somewhat uplifting.
Thank you so much for your kind words, I appreciate a lot your support! π
Beautiful poem, I loved it β€
Thank you soo much dearπ
This is so beautiful - I love the structure <3
Thank you soo much, Iβm really glad you enjoyed it π
Love how it starts off daunting and ends with hope.
Thank you so much!! π